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This program delves into the complexities and nuances of non-monogamous relationships, providing a robust framework for therapists to approach these dynamics with sensitivity, empathy, and competence. Expand your skills, improve client outcomes, and make a positive impact. "Working with Non-monogamy in Therapy" is a comprehensive, self-paced program designed specifically for therapists and mental health professionals who wish to deepen their understanding and enhance their skills in supporting clients exploring or practicing non-monogamy. All previous participants on this course have said that they feel more confident working with non-monogamy after completing the course, as well as, that they would recommend this course to colleagues. The self-paced course features text-based content, reflection questions, quizzes for certification, and feedback questionnaires to enhance your confidence and skills in supporting clients in a non-monogamous context. Sections covered: Types of relationships that fall under the non-monogamy (multiamory) umbrella Challenging assumptions, stigmas, and myths Themes in the work Intersectionality Ways of working with clients Takeaways 4 hours of informal CPD logging for most Professional Membership Bodies. The "badge" for starting and completing the course is an online profile badge. All membership data is stored on Wix. Check their privacy policy for details - https://www.wix.com/about/privacy

This is a guide for anyone wanting to know more about non-monogamy and how to navigate relationships. If you are a trainee or qualified therapist, this can be used as a taster for my "Working with Non-monogamous Clients" Course. Whether you're curious about non-monogamy or a therapist looking to enhance your practice, this course offers valuable knowledge. Delve into topics like different relationship types, self-identity, considerations, and pitfalls to avoid. The self-paced online learning format includes text-based content, reflective question, and a feedback questionnaire. Join me on this enlightening journey to deepen your understanding of non-monogamous relationships and improve your relationship navigation skills. All membership data is stored on Wix. Check their privacy policy for details - https://www.wix.com/about/privacy The full PDF download is available at the end of the click through "course" as well as being sent a £10 off the CPD course.

What is Intersectionality? How Assumptions play into the work? So how do we work with Intersectionality in Therapy? As the therapist As the client What is Intersectionality? The Oxford Dictionary definition is, “the interconnected nature of ,social categorisations such as race, class, and gender, regarded as creating overlapping and interdependent systems of discrimination or disadvantage”. It was originally applied to women's rights and the feminist movement to be able to acknowledge that whilst they were fighting for women's rights different intersections would be fighting from a different place which may be disadvantaged and how this then has an impact on their experience of being a woman from their intersections lens, e.g. a trans woman's experience fighting for  women's rights and their experience of  women's rights will be different to a cis woman's experience. In terms of how this fits into therapy, it's important to recognise that whilst parts of ourselves don't define us, they do have an impact and can be linked to create our individual experience of oppression and disadvantage. Essentially, meet the client where they are and recognise where they've come from. Our intersections add layers on to who we are and how we are treated in the world. They are the makeup of our experiences; they could be drawn out as a Venn Diagram: Taken From - https://www.tidalequality.com/blog/a-venn-diagram-of-belonging-where-identities-equity-and-inclusion-intersect But everyone's Venn Diagram of their own intersections and how they relate to them will look different. For example - My experience as a woman will be different to a trans woman's experience, or to a woman who has no illnesses, or who is a person of colour, but being a woman will have an impact for each of us in different ways in making up our experience of the world. How Assumptions play into the work? Assumptions are so important as a therapist as we can't assume to know the clients experience without them telling us! Vice Versa a client might project on to you if you have a similar intersection e.g. chronic illness that you have experienced the same kind of things that they have. If we don't address the assumption on either end, it can lead to misunderstandings and as therapists not meeting the client where they're actually at. E.g my fibro diagnosis process was horrible, took longer than it needed, lots of dismissal, and eventually going private. However, I know other people who have been diagnosed in their first appointment with their GP! We both have a diagnosis of fibro but our experiences of diagnosis were so different. So how might we work with Intersectionality in Therapy? As the therapist: Think about your own experience and get familiar with it This can be especially important when working with clients with similar intersections to us as we may notice something trigger inside us or emotions come up that are our own. We need to try and be aware of these moments so we can either: put a name to our own stuff and use it in the session (where relevant) - e.g. sometimes if a client tells me they were dismissed by GPs it brings up anger in me which is from my own stuff but I also wonder if it's theirs too, so naming "I'm feeling angry, I know some of this is my own but I'm wondering if that's coming up for you too?" Or we need to be able to put it to the side so we can refocus on what's going on for the client in front of us. Look into your unconscious biases and how these might come into play when working with people with similar or different experiences in life to you Harvard have a great research study going on with this where you can complete their unconscious bias tests to see what stands out for you - https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/takeatest.html Notice your privilege - e.g. I am chronically ill, queer, and suspected ND, but I am also a cis woman, white, and stable financially which give me a lot of privilege which needs to be acknowledged. This is also true when looking at how privileged intersections have played a part in oppressing many. Sometimes it is good to have these conversations in therapy with clients. e.g. if you're white and you have a global majority client, it can be useful to have a conversation around your privilege, safety, being culturally aware, validating lived experience, and (especially) asking questions before making assumptions. As the client: Think about what you want from a therapist: It can be great to know that a therapist who is also queer might have more of an understanding of the queer scene, dating, body acceptance, etc. but it is also important to remember that whilst they might get it on a closer level to most - your experience is yours and this is what they'll focus on. Think about what you need to feel safe in therapy. If someone of a certain gender, sexuality, race, religion etc. would make you feel more comfortable due to the familiarity, absolutely look for that. When finding a therapist think about what is important for you in this regard and any questions you may want to ask. Maybe you want someone who's had a completely different experience to life than you so that they can really challenge your perspective. You do not/should not have to teach your therapist! Sometimes it can be good to correct your therapist if they've made an assumption or they've got something wrong - it happens - but this shouldn't be a thing that is repeated where you end up educating them more than you actually get from the sessions. Don't be afraid to correct your therapist, especially if they've caused harm - but also if it's not comfortable to do this then don't risk your safety You can leave and find someone new if you feel consistently unsafe and worse after sessions. Remember privilege goes both ways. Sometimes a therapist may challenge you and if they're challenging you from a place of oppression and you get defensive, try to think why this might be? e.g. maybe your cis woman therapist challenges you a cis male client on the language and behaviours you use when discussing women. They may be challenging you from their lived experience of being on the other side of it. Difference between a challenge in therapy and an accusation? A challenge is trying to get you to look at things in a different way so generally it might be phrased in a way of "I wonder what it might look like if....", "I'm curious what approaching it like this might look like" whereas an accusation would be more of a statement of blame. Further Reading & Resources: Useful to know about and understand microaggressions - https://equality-diversity.ed.ac.uk/students/microaggressions/what-are-microaggressions A very generalised an quick test to look at privilege - https://www.idrlabs.com/intersectionalism/test.php https://www.womankind.org.uk/intersectionality-101-what-is-it-and-why-is-it-important/ https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11212199/

I have posted quite a few Instagram posts in relation to all of these topics but I have yet to write a full blog post about them, so I figured now is a good time to sit down and put it all together into one place. Relationships: There are so many different types of relationships where the language is really more of a guideline for how a relationship can look, as I truly believe that each relationship is individual to each person involved. When outlining all of these relationships below please note that in each of these circumstances having open, honest communication is an important skill to cultivate with your partner(s), and above all else the relationships described are for individuals being ethical, consensual, and of legal age. Platonic relationships - these can be friendships or deeply connected relationships that don't involve sexual or romantic interactions. Monogamous relationships - a relationship between 2 people where they do not date, have romantic or sexual contact with anyone else outside of this relationship. Monogamish relationships - a relationship between 2 people where there may be some casual dating/sexual/romantic contact outside of the 2 people, e.g. causal threesomes, not being help to monogamy in different countries/state lines, or the idea of a 'hall pass' . Ethical non monogamous relationships: Open relationships - where a relationship has the guideline that dating, sexual contact, and/or romantic contact can happen outside of the primary relationship i.e. being open to other relationships. This can be true of one or all individuals in the relationship e.g. one person may be monogamous, but the other is polyamorous and open to other partners. Swinging - Where people in a relationship are primarily open to sexual experiences through parties, events, or exchanging partners with another couple. Swinging is often planned ahead and seen as event based rather than being open all the time. Relationship anarchy - where there are no set guidelines on what the relationship is other than what is agreed between each partner. Taking the relationships out of the set constructs allowing there to be no expectations of what the relationship will be/where it will go. Polyamory - being open to having multiple relationships at the same time. This can be where there is no set hierarchy, or it can be where couples have a primary relationship which they date outside of. Polyamorous relationships can also be a mix of romantic or sexual relationships. Polyfidelity - where members in a polyamorous relationship will not date, have romantic partners or sexual partners outside of the members in the current relationship e.g. three people in a relationship making a triad and being committed solely to each other. There is no right or wrong way to be in an adult, consenting, and ethical relationship. All of the relationships above will take work, communication, sharing, and honesty. They will all involve an element of allowing yourself to be vulnerable with your partner(s) and trusting them. There is also a misconception that an ethical non-monogamous relationship is 'an excuse for people to cheat and feel okay with it', however this is not the case. Cheating is where a partner has betrayed trust - a person in a polyamorous relationship can still be cheated on by not telling the truth around how many partners they have or if they have been sexually active with partners they said they wouldn't be. Polyamory, and ethical non-monogamy on a whole, still requires trust in partnerships. It still means being hurt, let down, or going through break-ups when things don't work out. It can still mean being cheated on. It can still mean being single even though you're open to multiple relationships. None of this is taken away from people in ENM relationships, and those feelings are still 100% valid of an experience. Monogamy isn't for everyone, but it also isn't forced for people either, just as ENM relationships aren't for everyone either. Relationships are a connection, understanding and partnership between the people involved and the external opinions put on those aren't necessary as what works for one person may not work for another. https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/ethical-non-monogamy-guide https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/monogamy/what-is-ethical-non-monogamy/ https://www.healthline.com/health/types-of-relationships#r-z Love: We've talked about the types of relationships people can have, now lets look at the types of love and connection we can have with the people in our lives. For me personally, I like to go off the Ancient Greek types of love that we can have and express to others: Romantic love: Ludos - a playful type of love reminiscent of 'young lovers', being flirty with those you have feelings for. Pragma - a love that is standing the test of time, love for someone that has shown commitment, devotion, and adapted to the changes of the relationship. Eros - a lustful type of love that we can have for someone, the deep desire for sexual connection with that person. The Ancient Greeks saw this as a loss of control where the inner desires took over the cognition. Mania - where love becomes an obsession, the person is all you can think about. This love is codependent and linked with feelings of extreme jealousy and rage. Platonic/family love: Philia - a love that doesn't depend on physical attraction but is more to do with the platonic connection we have with someone. This is an affectionate love where we care for someone. Storge - a protective, kinship love felt between family members - often the type of love that parents try to express towards their children and vice-versa. Self love: Philautia - Being able to care for yourself, address your needs before caring for others. “All friendly feelings for others are an extension of a man’s feelings for himself.” - Aristotle. Altruistic love: Agape - this is a love that is universal and above ourselves. This type of love would be linked to being altruistic or doing things for the love of our community, the world, the earth, humanity, the religion you believe in etc. This is having empathy for people whether they are known to you or strangers - an unconditional love. Emotions and feelings can be complicated, expressing love for people can sometimes be misunderstood. We can care so deeply for someone yet not want to be romantic or sexual with them, but how do you then express that? The distinction for me is - I can love my friends, my family, my partner, my pets as this is love for who they are, the qualities they have, the connection we have, the trust, the laughter, the safety the evoke etc. However I am 'in love' with my husband, for me being in love is the distinction to then being romantic with someone. This might not be the same for everyone but hopefully reading about different types of love can open your eyes or help you make sense of your feelings towards those around you. https://greekcitytimes.com/2020/02/14/the-8-ancient-greek-words-for-love/ We can then also show our love in different ways. A good way of figuring this out is looking at the 5 love languages - this is a very generalised way of looking out how we show and receive love from people, but it is a start to understanding that what we might do to show our affection might not mean the same for other people and vice versa. Words of Affirmation - receiving letters, texts, spoken words describing the affection someone feels for you. Being told 'i love you'. Acts of Service - having someone show their affection and care by noticing the needs that you have - i.e. tidying the house to prevent anxiety, getting the shopping ordered so you don't have to etc. Receiving Gifts - showing affection through gifts, these can be gifts we buy or gifts we make. Quality Time - spending time with you, watching your favourite TV/films, going for walks together, doing hobbies together, staying up and talking about goals/dreams/aspirations. Physical Touch - not just sexual intimacy, but being close to each other, hugging, holding hands, reassuring with touch etc. It is believed that we will generally prefer one of these types above the rest when being shown affection, yet it may be we prefer to show our affection differently. You can take a quick quiz by Dr. Gary Chapman who theorised this concept - https://www.5lovelanguages.com/5-love-languages/ Sexuality: Sexuality can then play into the relationships you have, the love you show and the feelings you express. Sexuality is something that a lot of people are still learning for themselves and so the terminology is still catching up - the important thing is that you are valid in whatever your sexuality is and however you feel. Sexuality is also something that is consensual love and so the movement to include pedophilia into the LGBTQ+ spectrum is not accepted in this way. For a list of sexualities and their definitions, I have linked a post from Unite UK who have a lot of resources around sexuality and gender - https://uniteuk1.com/2018/06/a-z-list-of-sexualities/ Attraction: Finally, we can also have different types of attraction towards different genders or find our attraction changes with our hormone cycles. Attraction can be fluid across a spectrum which can leave looking at our sexuality to be confusing and overwhelming as it adds another layer to what we feel at certain times. Sexual attraction - having a desire to be sexual with someone. Intellectual attraction - wanting to engage in intellectual stimulation with someone else, being attracted to how someone thinks, or the knowledge they have on subjects. Aesthetic attraction - disconnected from romantic and sexual attractions, but being able to appreciate how someone looks. Emotional attraction - being attracted to someone for their personality, their traits, their qualities, rather than their looks/intellect. Sensual attraction - wanting to be close to somebody in a physical way that isn't sexual i.e. cuddling or hugging. Romantic attraction - having a deep desire to be with somebody and interact with them, involving emotional connections. Our attractions can sync up with each other or they can be completely separate for different people or even genders. It might be that you have romantic and sexual attraction to one gender but only have an aesthetic attraction to another gender. https://lgbtq.unc.edu/resources/exploring-identities/asexuality-attraction-and-romantic-orientation https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/attraction/what-are-different-types-of-attraction/ How these can all work together? There are infinite possibilities of how our relationships, love, attraction and sexuality all pay a part. It could be that you define yourself as straight in a non-monogamous relationship, but you are on the asexual scale where you have romantic attraction without sexual attraction for your partners, yet you can still be in love with these people. You might be pansexual in a monogamous, where you have full attraction to your partner of one gender, but you still have attraction to other genders in different ways without acting on the attraction. You can still then love other people but only be in love with your partner. Again, the important aspect is that whatever you are feeling is fully valid for you. You define your own attraction, sexuality, love and relationship in a way that feels right for you within the confines of being ethical and consensual. I would love to know your thoughts on this and if there's any other links readers can check out that I haven't included! And please if you are struggling with any of the above and are looking to talk to someone please do get in touch and we can look at sessions that work for you. Check out my availability here - www.emilyduffytherapy.co.uk/book-online Are you a Therapist, Counsellor, Psychotherapist, or Mental Health Professional and want to know more about working with Non-Monogamous Clients? Check out my online course - here

I've been thinking a lot lately about perfectionism within our society and how it is so engrained - it's no surprise many of us have dips in mental health or develop mental health conditions! When I talk about society in this post, I am referring to the westernised society which imposes it's norms onto people of all cultures, races, religions, abilities, ages, within it. Most of us learn to strive for perfection, even though we are only human and it is an unrealistic expectation to have on ourselves! Definitions Examples of perfectionism in society When Perfectionism can be good The Perception Skew What we can do to challenge perfectionism within ourselves? Resources Definitions First of all, lets start of with what perfectionism is. Dictionary.com defines perfectionism as, "a personal standard, attitude, or philosophy that demands perfection and rejects anything less.". Having these kind of standard for ourselves causes us to be under so much pressure that we are constantly feeling like a failure, like we're doing wrong, like we're useless..... Secondly, a study into the 'Acceptance of Imperfection' states , "Some humans may have one or several favourable qualities that are well-developed, but because of the multidimensional nature of humans no individual can be denoted as perfect, flawless, or unequivocally without fault. All humans are imperfect." So, how are we meant to hold our selves to impossibly high standards of perfection, when we innately are not perfect? On top of this, perfection of one aspect of life (religion, morals, looks, personality, qualities, lifestyle etc.) will be different from one person to the next. Some studies have found that perfectionism within young people has increased in more recent years - https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2018/01/perfectionism-young-people And there are also suggestions that that neurodivergent individuals are more likely to have a perfectionist traits too - https://www.kristinvanvloten.com/writing/perfectionism-and-neurodivergence Where perfectionism shows up in society The 'ideal' or perfection runs so deep in our society, the more I think about it the more I see it. Food - Have you noticed how 'wonky' veg is priced cheaper because it's not deemed the ideal shape for a vegetable? If you want to really read into it, it can give a message that something that is imperfect is less desirable and worth less than something deemed ideal. Food isn't made to be perfect - it's purpose for us is to be nutritious and this can be done whether it is the 'ideal' shape, colour, size, that society has deemed to be 'perfect'. Relationship Types - It's no secret that our society puts monogamy on a pedestal even though there are many different relationship types that are equally as valid. There is often little positive representation of non-monogamous relationships, and when there is some representation it is often shown in a really stereotypical and negative way or as a side story - it plays into the narrative that monogamy is the 'ideal' and 'right' choice. When you go further into monogamy and societal values, the message is often to find "the one", that you are choosing someone else to be your everything and that they should be able to fulfil all of your needs - So. Much. Pressure! If we look at Disney (and most rom-coms), most of their classic messages were once the princess found "the one" they lived happily ever after as though everything was perfect, but life and relationships aren't like this, they are messy, can be complex, take work, and don't always fulfil all of our needs so it can mean compromising. Body Image - From a young age we are told what our bodies "should" look like. Make up and beauty industries target young girls. Fitness industries and influencers target young boys. Everyone is subject to needing to present a certain way in society. Our weight and body shape are often incorrectly linked to our health. It leaks into what we eat, how we look, body modifications, and how we maintain fitness and health and it then impacts how we see ourselves and can lead to body dysmorphia and a negative body appreciation. Work/School - Again from such a young age we are pushed into societies version of what is "good", a perfect attendance record and top grades are celebrated, whilst those who struggle with the education system and attendance are often punished rather than offered support (obviously there is nuance to this depending on your school). This then carries over into work life where you are expected to have ambition and to keep progressing, hitting targets and performance goals rather than necessarily cultivating your current skills and position. Again there is an element of "attendance" where you can be punished if this isn't achieved. When Perfectionism can be good Whilst perfectionism can show up in most areas of life, it isn't always a bad thing; similar to stress, it can be helpful until it becomes overwhelming and maladaptive. Perfectionism can boost motivation, it can give us something to aim for when it is set within realistic standards and with compassion. When we have a healthy relationship with perfectionism, it can allow us to see "mistakes" or "failures" as opportunities to learn and grow. To improve on what we're already doing without the immense pressure. It can allow us to have high standards for ourselves in what we're doing - but again providing our expectations are grounded in reality rather than being skewed. The perception skew There are many reasons as to why you may slip into this distorted way of thinking and striving for perfection, feeling like nothing you do is "good enough". I felt this way in my private practice until my supervisor blew my mind with where good enough actually falls on a scale of "bad" to "perfect". Logically I knew this, but thinking about it in this way really helped me see just *how much* pressure and unrealistic expectations I was putting on myself - yet I would never expect that from others either! This skewed perfectionism & "good enough" mindset can come out in so many areas of life: family, friendships, relationships, values, morals, work, behaviours, standards, expectations, finances, health, productivity, housework, etc. What we can do to challenge perfectionism within ourselves? Often the chase for perfectionism in some form actually means we neglect certain parts of our wellbeing. For example, I have often had perfectionism within my work - I once had a manager tell me to slow down, that I needed to learn that me giving just 50% is still probably as good a someone else's 100%! I was putting too much into my work and my health was taking the brunt of it all. I was forced to challenge my perfectionism in order to look after my health. My perfectionism was spurred on by anxiety of doing things "right" and a fear of letting people down. For me, challenging it was about realising my perspective of what is "good enough" and what is "perfect" as well as learning to be compassionate with myself. Challenging your inner narrative - What type of thoughts come to mind with your perfection - is it similar to my example above? What is your narrative behind if you're not perfect - "If I'm not perfect, I am....." Is this way of thinking based in reality with evidence or is it based out of anxiety and from external sources. Self Compassion - Not hitting perfection can mean that we end up berating ourselves and punishing ourselves further - that we're not good enough. So, trying to be compassionate when finding ourselves leaning into perfectionism can help ease the pressure we put on ourselves. Sitting with the idea of imperfection - What does imperfection look like? What would it be like to let yourself be imperfect? Therapy - A therapist can help you explore the above ways of challenging perfectionism and dig deeper into the roots. Check out my availability here. Resources: The Australian Government have some great workbooks on different topics, one of which is perfectionism - https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/looking-after-yourself/perfectionism Some other ways of challenging perfectionism - https://www.bps.org.uk/psychologist/7-ways-overcome-perfectionism Answer some questions to gauge if perfectionism is something you struggle with - https://www.psychologytools.com/articles/learn-about-perfectionism

Meet Emily Duffy, integrative therapist specialising in queer, neurodivergent & chronic illness identity support. Accredited, lived‑ experience therapist working online UK. Check Availability About Me: About Me Emily Duffy (She/Her) MNCPS (accredited) Membership type: Accredited Membership number: NCS20-02120 My Story I am a multiamory/non-monogamy, queer, neurodivergent (ND), chronic illness, and body neutral therapist who has involvement in these communities. I’m Emily (she/her) — an integrative therapist on a mission to help people whose identities, relationships, or bodies don’t always fit the mainstream. With both lived experience and professional training, I understand what it’s like to feel unseen, misunderstood ,or excluded and I believe you deserve a space where you are seen, accepted, and valued. Since studying my A-level in Psychology, I have always had a curiosity with relationships and how we as humans interact with each other. As a queer, ambiamorous, suspected ND woman who has chronic illnesses, the curiosity was bolstered by my own experiences and hardships in life, therapy offered me a chance to work through things that I hadn't yet processed, to explore my identity, manage my "symptoms", and begin to look forward to my future. Life throws many surprises at us, and while we cannot predict the outcome of any situation, we can take control of how we respond to certain situations. I believe that we are the experts of our own lives and identities, and as your therapist I am here to understand, explore, and affirm who you are within our work. Over the past 6 years, I have worked with a range of clients in my Private Practice, The Mix, Grief Chat, and Humankind Charity, alongside 13 years of working in pastoral support roles for different education providers in FE and HE. I have also volunteered over my working life as a Listening Volunteer with the Samaritan's and as a Befriender with Age UK. I have continued my training since qualifying in topics such as Gender Diversity, Trauma, CBT for anxiety, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and supporting the bereaved, amongst others. Other qualifications & credentials are here. Want to know more? Check out how I work & fees. What I can help you with: My lived Experience = * My professional Experience = + Anxiety *+ Depression *+ Mental Health *+ Sexuality *+ Gender + Non-monogamy *+ Learning Self-Compassion & "Inner Narrative" Self-Talk *+ Chronic Illness & Disability *+ Neurodivergence + Bereavement, Grief, and Loss *+ N.B. Whilst I do not specialise in trauma work I have done training around working with trauma in an informed way and I embody this through all my work. Book in with me here (Video or Phone)

Frequently asked questions and their answers such as what is counselling, what's the consultation, fees, availability etc. Check Availability ! Widget Didn’t Load Check your internet and refresh this page. If that doesn’t work, contact us.

Explore therapy expectations with Emily Duffy, offering tailored, compassionate counseling for your needs. Therapy expectations matter. Check Availability How I work and Fees Email or Video/Phone Sessions How I work Approaches How do we start Fees How I work As an integrative/pluralistic therapist I adapt my way of working to your individual preferences in a collaborative and consent-led way. I believe you are the expert of yourself, and so, we will talk about what it is you would like to get out of counselling and look at ways we can do this; the approaches and methods used will be used to account for intersectionality, without pathologising you i.e. I work with YOU in a holistic way. My core way of working is co-creating a safe, compassionate, affirming, and non-judgemental space through person centred counselling and it's core conditions, which are to hold you with unconditional positive regard, empathy, and congruence. Safety is a big part of my work, and I will work with you to create a space you feel safe in and allow stability in exploring what you need to. This might mean using fidget toys, writing notes in sessions, turning the camera off if low on spoons, having a drink readily available etc. and it might mean looking at how the sessions are structured, i.e. whether we have a more structured format of this is what we'll look at each session, whether it's more open for whatever is on your mind that day, or maybe a mix! What approaches do you use? Gestalt - using metaphors, looking at the 'here & now' work, and somatic exploration/body work. Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT)/ Solution Focused Therapy (SFT) - using mindfulness techniques to explore our ways of thinking, looking at how this can be different, how this can then impact our behaviour/emotions, and how we can change our behaviour/ways of thinking to move forward. Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) & Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) - looking at our internal narrative, how we can be more compassionate and accepting to ourselves. **Note that I do not use every approach with every client. It will depend on what works for you and your preferences. Depending on what it is you're wanting to explore, how long we work together, and your preferences, will depend on the techniques used in our sessions. If you are considering short term work with myself then we will look at the most pressing issue you would like to focus on, whereas longer term work will allow more breadth of work. Check out my about me and qualifications if you'd like to know more on my experience. How do we start? In whichever scenario we will have a 45 minute session at a discounted price for an introductory consultation; this allows us to talk more about what you're looking to get from therapy sessions & how we might work together, to go through the counselling contract, for you to ask any questions you may have to check I'm the right therapist for you, and to assess if you would like to continue with myself going forward. All of my sessions are on a one-to-one basis, for residents of the UK only, and currently I am only offering remote sessions via Google Meet, Phone Call or Email. For more info on contracting, what to expect, the consultation process, and AI use, check out my FAQs and my blog How much are sessions? The initial consultation will be £30 for up to 45 minutes My guide fee for ongoing 50 minute sessions is £70 unless otherwise agreed*. *If you feel you are unable to afford this we can discuss low cost options in our consultation. How does low cost work? I work on a "pay what you can afford" basis where we will have an open and honest conversation about what is affordable for you and I will take your lead. This is agreed upon in good faith and without needing "evidence". If you don't feel able to commit to the same fee every week we can explore other options too. How I work Approaches How do we start Fees How do I know if email or video/phone is more suitable? Below are some questions which may help you assess whether email therapy is suitable for you. I feel comfortable reading and interpreting text I feel comfortable waiting on a response to questions I don't have much space to connect via video I have some specific things I want to work on I am comfortable writing about my feelings I feel uncomfortable verbalising what's going on I don't have a reliable internet connection I feel at risk of harming myself and need real time support I need flexibility in when I see my therapist Yes (Email) No (Video/Phone) Yes (Email) No (Video/Phone) Yes (Email) No (Video/Phone) Either, but email tends to be more directive Yes (Email) No (Video/Phone) Yes (Email) No (Video/Phone) Yes (Email) No (Video/Phone) Yes (Video/Phone) No (Email) Either, but email allows more flexibility If you're still unsure please do get in touch with me and we can talk through the options. I am open to starting off on one form of therapy with the potential to change to an alternative as the work progresses so you are not stuck in Email, Video, or Phone call from the off. Questions? Email or Video/Phone Sessions

This is an online session via Google Meet. I do only work one-to-one and with residents of the UK currently so please bear this in mind when booking. Please note you can only see bookings for 3 weeks in advance.

Book a consultation with me to see if email sessions are something you'd like to go forward with