How to Manage Compassion Fatigue
- Emily Duffy
- Aug 24
- 6 min read
What is Compassion Fatigue?
Compassion fatigue can happen for most of us, but those in activism, support work, health work, or pastoral work can be at a heightened risk. Compassion fatigue is where we become physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted from the demands of holding space for others. There are so many causes we can get involved in, and if you're anything like me, many of them are close to my heart.
Compassion fatigue is sometimes call vicarious trauma or secondary stress reaction as it is a response to taking on other peoples emotions, not having enough support in place for ourselves, and thus experiencing a type of emotional burnout. Imagine a phone battery - this is our capacity for compassion for others - if we leave it with different apps open draining that battery we will eventually run out and become exhausted. We need to be able to recharge this battery - gaining compassion resilience - in order to keep going and offering support.
How can I notice if I'm suffering from Compassion Fatigue?
Compassion fatigue can have a big impact on personal life & professional life, and if not addressed over time it can become debilitating. It can come out in many different ways, it isn't just psychological, it can be physiological too.
You might start to feel helpless, powerless, and stuck when faced with others suffering .
You may notice your ability to hold others with compassion and empathy to be dwindling and no longer able to access it. Sometimes this can be thoughts and feelings of lacking care.
You may experience feelings of detachment and withdrawal from those around you and yourself -
You might find yourself withdrawing from socialising with others; feeling like being social is "too much". You may feel numb to others needs and neglect your relationships.
You may experience mood swings with increased frustration, anger, irritability, and anxiety. This may come out in feeling like your constantly "under threat" with an activated "fight or flight mode" even when sitting by yourself. It can be a feeling of impending doom and having no control. You may also feel listless and not have any interest or joy in things you used to.
Work demands and personal demands from those you care about may become overwhelming to you. You may freeze and feel paralysed with not knowing what to do.
Your ability to concentrate and focus can become affected with brain fog. This can impact both work and personal life by making it hard to make decisions.
Neglecting your own self care is a symptom of compassion fatigue as it not only affects our ability to hold other with empathy but ourselves too.
There are also then the physiological symptoms of compassion fatigue:
Fatigue and exhaustion.
Sleep can become impacted with disturbed sleep (not being able to get to sleep, not being able to "switch our brains off", waking up throughout the night) and also with nightmares.
Headaches and migraines
Tension in your body causing aches and pains
Changes in appetite - it could be a lack of appetite or it could be increasing our intake.
Increase in stress can lead to changes in weight
Immune system can be compromised and so you might find yourself getting ill more often e.g. colds.
Nausea and digestive issues
Dizziness
Muscle twitching - when I get run down my eye twitching tends to be my biggest give away sign
What can I do to look after myself?
We are unfortunately in a position where we can't always change our environment and so self-care can only go so far. Many of us struggle in the worlds landscape of systemic oppression, bigotry, capitalism, and a patriarchal society. I get so angry, frustrated, and heartbroken at all that's going on in the world and want to do all I can to help others, but with chronic illnesses and being a therapist, there is only so much I can do before I would burn myself out completely.
I am not saying don't get involved in any causes yourself, but to look after your wellbeing when you do, as you are important too and your capacity for how much you can offer will be unique to you. Below I have made some suggestions of what could be useful and ease the weight of the compassion fatigue enough to recover.
Ways to manage professional work:
💚 Speak to your Supervisor/Support - As therapists we often have a supervisor who is there for us to talk to about our caseload and anything we might be struggling with. Hopefully most caring roles have something similar and someone who you can talk to about your caseload and how you might be able to change it or ease up a little whilst you can recover.
💚 Look at your works EAP (if you don't have one, check out helplines below) - An EAP is an Employee Assistance Programme which is there for all employees who might need some support from a third party. Sometimes this is a helpline, sometimes this is counselling, sometimes it's just other wellbeing services (I've seen coupons for spa days and things).
💚 Take some time off - You could look at getting signed off sick if you feel that work isn't supportive and you need some time and space away from that environment. The downside is, if nothing is going to change at work this is a short-term solution, still may be a necessary one though!
💚 Look at putting professional boundaries in place - You are allowed to say no at work. A no could look like, "I can't today but ask again tomorrow", "is there anyone else you could ask for this", "I am unable to make this a priority right now", "no, I don't have time for that", "no, I am unable to manage that".
💚 Speak to your GP or HR about occupational health review and reasonable adjustments - https://www.acas.org.uk/using-occupational-health-at-work
💚 Training for managers - https://www.wtwco.com/en-gb/insights/2022/09/awake-to-exhaustion-how-employers-can-help-staff-suffering-from-compassion-fatigue
💚Maybe a switch in role or career? - This is likely the last resort but if you're unable to change your environment and you aren't receiving support there's not too much that is going to let you recover, and so sometimes it can be moving jobs that can help with this process.
Ways you can look after your well-being:
💚 Build a routine - start with the basics and build from there. Taking things one step at a time
💚 Put boundaries in place - look at what your needs and capacity are and start to look at boundaries to help you meet these. Remember boundaries are things we put in place for ourselves, not rules we put on others, though we do still have to communicate them.
💚 Self care - check out my post on different types of self care.
💚 Limit news and social media usage outside of work - take some time to switch off from the wider world and try to refocus on your immediate world or self.
💚 Hobbies - reconnect with some joy and do something that brings you peace.
💚 Be kind to yourself - practice some self-compassion. The analogy of putting your own oxygen mask on before helping others is a cliché for a reason!
💚 Support Network - re-connect with those you trust and care for you.
💚 Exercise and movement - reconnect with your body and be present with yourself
💚 Mindful Eating - I know I lean on food when I become overwhelmed and overloaded and go to quick easy options which may not be the best for me, so resetting and actually being present with what I'm eating is helpful.
💚 Sleep hygiene - try to get a bed-time routine in place. Look at similar times to sleep and wake up, look at white noise playlists/machines, eye masks, sleep sprays, blue lights etc.
💚 Therapy - I have many posts on why you might have therapy, what the approaches are like, what the process is like, and how to find a therapist to get you started.
💚 Ask for help - I have linked my posts around free & low cost support as well as helplines that can be helpful, too.
Different ways you can get involved in activism:
💚 Petitioning - There are so many petitions to sign online for good causes and it is something that you can actively do to put your name to something.
💚 Educating yourself (and others) - This is a difficult one, it reminds me of the meme around "walking a line between staying informed and losing my sanity". Definitely only do this if you have the capacity but educating yourself and others can be a way to put the anger and frustration into action.
💚 Raise Awareness - Once you have the understanding behind you, you can raise awareness of the topics that matter to you by:
💚 Fundraising
💚 Volunteering
💚 Use Social Media
💚 Write letters to your MP
💚 Challenge behaviours of, & have conversations with, those around you
💚 Protest (within the law, which is becoming more difficult!) - Whilst we still have the right to do so, you can go to peaceful protests to share in the frustration of others and feel connected.
💚 Go to Town Hall events - You don't have to participate but you can be around like minded people who are looking to make change.
💚 Make small, lasting changes to your lifestyle
Why not take the Self Test for compassion fatigue to see where you're at? - https://www.aafp.org/pubs/fpm/issues/2000/0400/p39.html
Further Reading:
Want to start working with me? Check out my Bookings page to see my availability.
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